The Beginning...

I've been debating with myself whether or not to blog about this because it's ongoing and somewhat personal. If I make one post about it, I'll have to make several and that is kind of like homework. But then I thought, it may be quite informational. If my information can help someone else than that's all that matters.

So basically, I'm fat. This is easy to tell because I have a picture on my profile that doesn't include even my whole face. Generally posting partial shots of yourself either means you are ugly or fat, or wanted by the FBI or the mob or something. That's probably an over generalization. Anyway, my picture means I'm fat. Not ugly. I swear. I'm gorgeous. Somewhat.

In any case, in combating the fat problem I've tried several options. Diets, not eating, stressing to the point of no appetite. Really, only the latter was effective. I lost 60 lbs that way. I promptly gained it back. I'm tired of this and have decided surgery to be the best answer for me.

So the journey for me actually began last month. In early October, when my insurance with Kaiser kicked in, I went to see the doctor for a sore throat. I figured since I was already there I'd ask the question. He referred me to a weight management class and I finally went yesterday. The instructor told me to contact the head dietitian at the office. That's the next step. Haven't gotten there yet.

I'm debating between a the Lap Band and the vertical sleeve.

I don't intend to make every post about this, but I figure it might be good to write about it occasionally. For informational purposes. Or whatever.

Oh, nuts!

I don't think I'm alone in believing that truck nuts are pretty vulgar. I live in a conservative area of California and where there are conservatives you can bet there are rednecks who think that truck nuts are a good statement. Well, I can't vouch for whether or not rednecks think it is a good statement, but it is a statement nonetheless. The obvious is to say that it is an attention grabber and in the end, isn't that what a mullet is too?

In any case, I was somewhat curious on what a pair for truck nuts cost the lowly of the gene pool. I didn't research too much, but I did find that they can cost up to $50. That seems like a lot of money to look like a jackass.

I also search google for "car genitalia". Results were not what I was hoping for. Apparently I cannot buy a labia for my little Hyundai.

Clearly...

... I have blue eyes.

Non-Special People Part I

Let’s get this straight: Being a mom does not make you special. There are literally like billions of them and you are no more special than any those.

So you nurse your children’s wounds, you read them bedtime stories, you watch after them, you provide for them tasty and nutritious food, and you hug them and let them know that you love them unconditionally and tell them that they could be anything in the world.

Fantastic. Good. You are doing your job. That’s the standard for being a good mom. Congratulations. If it were a real paying job, we would promote you to lead mother for your local group of mothers and you would offer motherly advice to said mothers.

However, being a mom does not grant you special mom powers. You do not have special privileges that the childless do not. Letting your kid scream in the middle of the mall is not acceptable behavior. If I started throwing a hissy fit because no one would buy me ice cream I’d probably be escorted out of the mall and told not to come back.

You do not deserve to have special rights. If I bust my boob out in public, it’s indecency. That’s at least a ticket if not a little time in the drunk tank in the jail. If you start feeding your baby boob juice at a Starbuck’s it’s supposedly beautiful and natural. How about a little respect for those of us that don’t want to watch a baby suckle on your fun bags?

Look, if being a mom was a special gig you would need some sort of credential to prove it. Do you have a doctorate in motherhood? At the very least a certificate? All you need is a working reproductive system and some sperms. You had a choice to become a mom. Stop acting like you deserve accolades for doing the very thing you signed up for.